Addiction: It’s Not Your Fault
You are not your addiction and you are not to blame for what you’ve been through. At Passages Malibu, we see your dependence on drugs or alcohol as a response to pain, stress, or trauma — not as a moral failing or a lifelong disease. When we uncover and heal the real causes, the need to use can finally fade.
You are not to blame for your addiction.
You are not to blame for your addiction. What you're going through right now is not your fault. You’ve been told otherwise and you may even believe it, that you’re to blame for not being able to quit. After all, many people who are addicted — quit. Why not you?
The reason you are not responsible for your addiction is that it was caused, and is being kept alive, and active by one or more of the Four Causes.
You have experienced or are currently experiencing conditions in your life that have made it impossible for you to quit. Even if you’ve been to treatment and quit for a while, you relapsed; probably many times.
No one has helped you find out what created and is keeping your addiction alive.
You may have suffered a trauma in childhood that was extremely painful, either physically or emotionally, such as sexual assault or the loss of a parent or close friend, or loss of an opportunity; one of those: “If only I had (or hadn’t) done that,” and you have buried the incident because it was so painful. Or maybe you remember it and haven’t been able to live with the memory. The loss is still there, in your conscious or subconscious. Certain events trigger the feelings you originally experienced. The feelings well up causing depression, fatigue, unhappiness, pain and frustration. Even though you may or may not remember the original loss, you feel the emotional pain. Because the pain and frustration are great enough and last long enough, you use a substance to alleviate the pain. But when the drug wears off, the cause of the pain is still there.
Even though you are able to quit for a while, the pain or depression is still with you and relief is easily at hand with your drug of choice. The reason drugs, including alcohol, which is the drug ethanol, are so hard to quit, is that they effectively ease your pain and depression. The problem is: The side effects are deadly, ruining your health, your relationships and anything else you hold dear. If there were no nasty side effects, no physical, emotional, financial, family downside, we would all use them. Most therapists don’t know what they are looking for or how to solve the mystery of your addiction. We do. But the secret is within you.
Talk to us. You will not tell us anything we haven’t heard many times before. And we do not judge you because whatever happened or is happening, it’s okay. Let us relieve you of the pain.
When you come to us, don’t hold back out of embarrassment, shame, fear or any other emotion that will keep your secret within you. We know that whatever it is, it’s not your fault. Don’t go home with your secret of your addiction locked inside you.
Most of our clients have forgotten their original cause because it’s too painful, too shameful, too traumatic, too embarrassing. The relief they experience when the cause is remembered and healed is one of the best feelings in the world. That’s the moment you will know you’ve escaped your addiction. We have seen thousands of clients experience that moment.
Talk to Passages Malibu in Complete Confidence.
Since 2001, Passages Malibu has set the standard for holistic, Non-12 Step addiction treatment.
You deserve the best help available. Call Passages anytime or fill out the confidential form below to speak with an admissions specialist and explore your treatment options.
Confidential Contact Form
A member of our admissions team will reach out as soon as possible. If this is an emergency, please call 911 or your local emergency number.